Sex, Marriage and Family

Ha, sorry, I'm not going to talk about sex, much.

I'm going to call my wife Clara for simplicity sake.

I met my wife while still in college, I had posted an ad online and she responded. We fell in lvoe quite quickly and were married about two years after we first met. We have been together for 10 years, married for 8.

I think the person (besides myself) that ADHD has affected most is my wife. My ability to pay attention and follow through have been seriously compromised by my ADHD.

Clara is by nature a very organized person and I am on the other end of the spectrum. It has been very hard for her to endure my condition. I am sure at times it must have seemed that I was actually trying to sabotage her efforts to greate an organized home. She has a really hard time living in a state of chaos, which is my normal state.

Clara will ask me to do a few things and I won't get them done because I either forget, or get sidetracked. This disappointments her and makes her feel as though I can't be counted on to follow through on things. To her my "childlike" state has been a drain on her and has driven her to treating me a little like a child at times which she hates and I despise.

I hope that treatment will help me be the person she wants me to be without taking away the parts of me that make me the wonderful guy that I am.

We have not had any children yet and have no plans to have them I can also attribute this to ADHD to some degree. Clara has no interest in the birth process either so that helps, but with a genetic link to ADHD and autism in my famil and hers the odds are stacked against us in terms of having a normal child and the thought of having a high needs kid makes us both feel sick to our stomachs. Beyond the genetics and body issues, I don't feel as though I would be a great parent. The thought of being responsible for a child and my lack of patience give me serious thoughts about how awful my life could be.

What makes this kind of tough is that in other ways I know I'd be an awsome Dad. I'm a fun guy and my kids would have great experiences growing up.

I think it's important to know your limitations and live within them and be happy with what God has given you. I am blessed and if I want to be invloved in the life of a child i have neices and nefews to be with.